Thursday, January 18, 2007

Pick Me! Pick Me!

We are waiting to be referred a child from the WCP, along with about 25 other families who are with our agency. While we had hoped that the agency would receive files to match all families (since they were told that they would!), that did not happen and they received 8 files- 4 boys and 4 girls.
So, now they are in the process of going through the list of children and matching them with families who are waiting for them- pretty much in chronological order- which would involve considering the special medical needs that a family has indicated they would accept, the age of the child they hope for, and whether they have indicated they wish to have a son or a daughter. Tough job- and I know that our agency does it very well. We're all grateful.
So, since we're near the bottom of the list (probably #25!), there is next to no chance of being matched soon, unless the other 17 expected files come in from China (please, please, please!).
But, here's the rub: I don't know the exact numbers for our group, but most families want girls. That's just the case with international adoption in general- most families request daughters. Maybe we can explore that issue in another post. So, some of the families high on the list (maybe as many as 4) are going to be asked to consider whether they'd accept a son instead of a daughter.
And we *want* a son so much, up to 2 years of age (i.e, he can be 2 years+ but just not 3 yet), that it's taking everything I've got not to call up the agency and say "Ooh, ooh, pick me, pick me!!!". (Some of you near my vintage might remember "Welcome Back Kotter"- yep- that's me- Arnold Horseshack- hand waving wildly in the air!)
Not that doing this would make a difference. Our agency would be sympathetic, I'm sure, but they would still follow through with their procedures, which are fair to everyone.
While my secret fantasy is that those families who want a girl decide to wait for daughters and those families (like us) that stated they wanted boys get "the call", I know this won't likely happen. Instead, these families will probably come to realize that they've been offered a nice surprise and will recognize these sons as the gifts that they are. I wish them the best with their decisions.
But, maybe... ah, forget it! ;)

9 comments:

walternatives said...

Arnold Horseshack - I'd forgotten about him. Here's hoping that they see that waving hand and (quickly) pick you! You're in my thoughts.

CA Momma said...

Me too. Positive thoughts your way. I would suggest bouncing up and down in your chair while waving your hand.

The Murphy's said...

Keep waving like crazy :) I hope you get your call, Keep positive, he'll join your family when the time is right.

redmaryjanes said...

I know that you are in the same situation as our mutual friend Ms. Dragonfly. Hang in there. I know that your dreams will come true. I just don't know the timeline.

Libby,Dave and Holly said...

Carolyn,
I will keep my fingers crossed for you. You just never know what may happen.

I look forward to your views on the preference of girls to boys by adoptive parents.

Libby

Elizabeth said...

Wow I didn't know that you were waiting for your son, how exciting! We are one of the families that requested a daughter. And I think we too are near the bottom of the pile. Maybe we'll travel together? Or maybe you'll get the call for your boy sooner. I hope they do pick you. If I were you I wouldn't be able to contain myself and would call. But patience isn't my great strength in life. Crossing my fingers for you!

"M" said...

Good luck, I hope you get a call. This process is a hard one, keep your spirits up. It WILL happen eventually.

Dorothy said...

Best of luck to you--must be nerve racking.

Tracey & Mike said...

Even though we're a FOI family & we're waiting too I'll hope you're hand waving gets noticed! We've asked for a girl, but only because we thought it would work better with our family situation - we have 4 year old girl already and not an overly huge house - ie. the kids would be sharing a room for the first couple of years. If we were offered a boy though we would definitely accept (as long as he is younger than our daughter).